Are You a Slow-Burn Lover or a Hot-Cold Heartbreaker?

Let’s see how you love. 9 quick questions—no judgment, just brutal self-awareness.

Let’s see how you love. 9 quick questions—no judgment, just brutal self-awareness 😏

Ready?

When someone actually likes you, your brain goes… *

When you don’t get a reply right away, your vibe is… *

Your idea of romantic stability is… *

Don’t worry—everyone’s cringed at themselves at least once already 😅 Keep going.

When someone tries to get emotionally close, you… *

The little voice in your head on date three says… *

When conflict hits, you usually… *

Honestly? You’re doing great. Self-awareness is sexy.

Closeness feels like… *

When you sense distance growing, you… *

If your love life had a tagline, it would be… *

Okay brave soul, last tap!

Drop your name and email and I’ll send your result + your 3-step dating result plan now!

First Name *

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And here’s what this cycle is costing you…

01

Time is passing

If you’re someone who wants marriage, kids, a life partner—you’re watching years disappear into these repetitive three-month situations. You’re 32, 35, 38, 41, and every failed relationship feels like time you can’t get back. The urgency makes the anxiety worse, which makes you rush more, which makes relationships fail faster. You’re trapped in a timeline that’s working against you.

02

You’re exhausted

Not sleepy-tired. Bone-deep exhausted from managing your anxiety every single day. From the chest tightness when you wake up and check your phone. From the mental gymnastics of analyzing every text. From pretending you’re calm and confident when internally you’re a smoke detector screaming. Coming home after dates and immediately texting your friends “ok so they said this, what does that MEAN”.

03

The shame is crushing

You’re a functional human in every other area of your life. You have a career. You pay your bills. You’re the friend people come to for advice. But in dating, you become someone you don’t recognize. And after every failed relationship, you have to explain to your friends—again—why it didn’t work out. Again. Even though they saw it coming. Even though you saw it coming. The embarrassment of being smart enough to know better but not able to do better is eating you alive.

04

You’re attracted to the wrong people

The emotionally available, secure people feel boring. The avoidant, inconsistent, “I don’t do labels” people feel like home. Because you learned that love requires anxiety and pursuit and constant proof. So the people who would actually be good for you don’t create the chemical reaction your body associates with connection. And the people who trigger you the hardest feel like soulmates.

05

You can’t tell if it’s your anxiety or if it’s real

When something feels off, you don’t know if you should trust it or if you’re just being “crazy” again. Are they actually pulling away or is that your abandonment wound? Are these red flags or are you self-sabotaging something good? Should you walk away or are you just too damaged for relationships? You’ve lost access to your own intuition because anxiety has hijacked the signal.

06

You’re starting to believe you’re broken

When everyone around you seems to date normally—meeting someone, taking it slow, building something over months without losing their minds—you wonder what’s wrong with YOU. Other people can apparently go on a date and then... just wait for the person to text? Without spiraling? Without checking their phone every four minutes? Without a full-blown anxiety attack? How?

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Starts November 20, 2025